May 22, 2007
My Fiery Temper
I am a redhead, and everyone knows what kind of temper redheads are supposed to have. To think that I'm in the company of kings and godly men when I lose it with my kids....I admit it doesn't make me feel much better, because while I read about them I realized how irrational and ungodly they were behaving.
First I read about Moses (Exodus 32:19), the precedent for the block flying out of my hand. He threw down the stone tablets on which the 10 commandments were written, and of course they smashed to bits. I'm sure it got everyone's attention - it was effective! But I am certain that's not what God gave him those tablets for! As I tell my kids, blocks aren't for throwing either...
Then there was Balaam (Numbers 22:27), whose donkey had a similar fate to the toddler standing on the toy that's not for climbing. In anger Balaam beat his donkey when it disobeyed him. How often do I discipline out of anger instead of love? Lord, help me to not lash out in anger, but to discipline with patience in love when my children disobey.
I checked out David's brother Eliab (1 Samuel 17:28), who hurled false accusations at David when he got angry, calling him conceited and wickedhearted. I don't often give voice to such accusations, though I often hear them from the mouths of my kids, and I must admit that such thoughts do enter my mind.
King Saul (1 Samuel 20:30), who was pretty famous for his violent temper, hurled insults at his own son (as well as his wife) when he realized he was befriending David. He called him the "son of a perverse and rebellious woman". I've heard insults in our day which make Saul's words almost sound nice. Thankfully such words rarely, if ever, cross my lips.
Even King David (2 Samuel 12:5) was not immune to having a bad temper. In burning anger, he promised death to the man Nathan told him had stolen and served for dinner the one precious lamb of another man. It was a rash and unjust judgment. The punishment certainly did not fit the crime, and if David had known he was judging against himself, I'm sure he would not have been so harsh. How ashamed I feel to realize that I am also apt to speak such rash and unjust promises when my kids are....er...um....well.... just being kids. Kids will run, they will climb, they will make each other cry at times, but a spanking and time in their room does not fit every one of their childish offenses. Lord, help me to be wise and discerning, understanding how You would have me train and discipline my children.
Yet another king, King Xerxes (Esther 1:12) was furious and burned with anger when his wife refused to do as he commanded. She was ultimately banished, and a new queen was sought. How often do my children refuse to do what I ask? How do I react to them? Do I banish them, yell at them, or reach out gently and in love to these precious little ones God has blessed me with. Lord, help me to extend your grace and love to my children and gently guide then in the right way, even when they refuse to listen.
And who could forget Jonah (Jonah 4:9), who was angry about everything after he had preached his doomsday message to Ninevah, but they had repented and the prophesied destruction didn't happen. God caused a vine to grow overnight and give him shelter as he waited for the "fireworks"...and then He caused that vine to die overnight. God asks him if he has any right to be angry about the vine. "I'm angry enough to die!" is Jonah's answer. Like Jonah I get angry and frustrated about things over which I have no control. Instead of just trusting God for His best, I start to look for what I think God should do...I expect my kids to be perfect angels overnight, or for them to at least stop running and yelling and climbing all through the house. Jonah, of course, sat back and did nothing, just simmering in his anger. He spoke unwisely and selfishly to God.
Lord, help me to weigh my words carefully and trust You to complete the work You are doing in Your perfect timing. Teach me what to say and do to help my children along on the right path, instead of swinging from the extreme of yelling, throwing, and hitting to the opposite extreme of just sitting down and waiting it out. Being a parent is hard, and I need your wisdom and guidance to bring these precious children up in the training and instruction of You, Lord. Amen.
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