The days here seem to drag on, but I don't feel up to going home yet. This morning Michelle came in and removed my catheter and disconnected the IV that had been feeding me lots of fluids. An hour later, I had the urge to empty my bladder. I was unsuccessful and quite afraid that I would still not be able to...how was I ever going to be able to go home?

I came back out and decided to go for a walk and then take a shower. Michelle even encouraged me to try to pee in the shower! I did try, but was not successful until I came back out, dried off and sat on the toilet once again. Relief! Later on that day, we celebrated again as I was able to pass gas through my bottom for the first time since my surgery. It's amazing how much you can get excited over the little things!

While I was out walking the hallway again later, the lactation consultant, Sharon, came by again. She returned when I was ready to nurse Rebekah, and again observed and helped us out. It's great to have the resources of the lactation consultants, nurses, and others right at hand. Holli, Joe's sister, has also done so much to help us out...from helping get Rebekah to nurse, to making meals so Joe doesn't starve or go broke (and malnourished) from fast food.

In the afternoon, Joe again kept watch while Rebekah and I tried to sleep. I began waking up with even more vivid nightmares. In one ridiculous dream, my father was throwing kitchen stools and boxes at me! I awoke in tears and was nearly inconsolable. I was exhausted and needed the sleep, but was as afraid to sleep as the characters in "Nightmare on Elm Street"! We finally mentioned the problem to one of the nurses, who told us there may be a connection between the pain medication I was receiving and the nightmares I was having. I don't know why no one had ever told us of this possible side effect, but I decided I would have no more Percoset! I began taking Motrin for the pain instead.

Rebekah's weight has been dropping. By yesterday her weight was down to 6 lbs, 11 oz. Tonight Joe and I both went to the nurses' station for Rebekah's assessment. Her weight had dropped to 6 lbs, 9 oz, so she had lost more than 10% of her birth weight. She was also showing signs of possible dehydration, but my milk came in tonight too, so the nurse was not overly concerned.

I nursed Rebekah until I fell asleep tonight after Joe left, and I woke up with a nurse bending over me with great concern. Apparently Rebekah had been crying and the nurse trying to wake me for about 5 minutes. At last I had been able to sleep soundly! But the nurse was so concerned that I be able to sleep more that she insisted on taking Rebekah to the nurses' station so that I could sleep uninterrupted. I insisted that she bring Rebekah back if she seemed hungry because I didn't want her to receive a bottle, pacifier, or formula at this point. I was distraught. The nurse had also recommended that I have Joe or someone take Rebekah out of the room on Friday so that I could get some good sleep. Even though it was the middle of the night, I called and left a message for Holli & Joe to let them know.

Awhile later, the nurse brought back a very hungry Rebekah, and I nursed her. She came back and collected my baby again, and I tried to sleep some more. A couple hours later, Rebekah was back and seemed quite hungry again. I was able to keep her with me until a nurse came by to take her to see the pediatrician. I then slept well for over an hour.
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